Friday, 25 April 2008

Nellie- cat

Although from my point of view I am a hound, through and through, those clowns that I live with are convince I am some sort of genetic mutant greyhound feline hybrid.
They are convinced that I am part feline for several unfounded reasons :

1) I love sardines & fish ( and TBG doesnt like a bit of battered cod with his chips ?)
2) I like to sit on your lap, ok I dont exactly sit on your lap as such as I am too big for that-apart from Twiggs who due to the size of her thunderous thighs has a huge lap. When I am lying on the sofa I use who ever is sat next to me as a giant Nellie cushion,as its not exactlly a big squishy squashy sofa.
3) I purr- well excuse me, I do not purr its a Nellie snore- and yes I do it with or with out my eyes closed, its due to the length of my neck & muzzle and having such a huge tounge..thank you very much, so it most certainly is not a Purr, yup its a Nellie snore and any one who says other wise will be sued for slander.
4) Snoozing in the sunshine- look I have no fat, I am like a giant reptile I store the heat that I absorb for when tightwad TBG turns the central heating off- that is until Twiggs notices and puts it back on.
5) I arch my back like a kitty when I am having a stretch, well blow me down...I am like 15 foot long you know, if I could get my legs above my head I would strech like tbg...although I would refrain from the acompanying scratching of the man bits !
6) I am very undemanding like a cat, i am not in your face, fuss me fuss me all the time, If I wish to be fussed I will allow you to do so and if I dont I will ignore you and walk away.
Ok I dont bury my Nellie Doodles, my tounge is not all dry and raspy, I dont find balls of string all that enertaining,I dont walk around showing my brown eye off, I dont go mew mew mew, I go WOOFETY WOOF WOOF !
I AM NOT A CAT, every thing is just conincidental !!!!!!!!

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