Kitchen : My mecca

I love the kitchen.so much so for about 3 weeks when i first came to reside here I thought my name was " Get Outta da kitchen !"
My kitchen is really long and narrow and I have learnt how to reverse now rather than try to turn around...reversing is better....much better I can do it at speed now.
Doggy rules are that anything dropped on the kitchen floor can rouse me from a coma and have me hurtling through to retrieve in the blink on eye...so if any thing is dropped..then its mine,, apart from cucumber- what is all that about then ???? Tea bags,especialy if hot....soon learnt my lesson on that one, not nice............. mushrooms are okish, cheese is better.
everything in kitchen sounds like something is being dropped into my bowl......... ok I said sounds like, Im not living the complete dream here.....
I have learnt not to lay in front of the cooker whilst Twiggs is cooking as this can scald, no not the fear of having hot fat or hot stuff fall on me, but the withering look ole bum face gives me......thats scarey !!!!!!
I dont steal from the kitchen- ok I admit there was that incident with the pizza, but I was new and there was cheese involved, also I cant open the fridge.
I like to lay at the entrance to the kitchen and practise my sad dog face, making my eyes go all big and giving the occasional sigh.when this doesnt work I get the telepathy radar going full pelt.... which hasnt worked yet, but will do one day....
Also doggy rules say that when the folks I own have finished their meals i can rightly assume that they will scrape yummy nom nom bits they have saved for me into my bowl, so then it is my doggy given right to stand longingly by my bowl.sods law also states thats the only bits I do get are veggies which Twiggs tried to feed to TBG- well he's not going to eat them why does he asume I will........ Ah well beggers cant be choosers, even if veggies arnt very nom nom, they fill a void in my tummy.
Shopping days, i love it when they go shopping and all the bags are dumped in the kitchen for twiggs to sort out and put away while TBG sits and recovers whilst watching re-runs of re-runs of Only fools and Horses ( again) : its my job to stick my snout in each bag, just to check they havent forgotten anything ( cheese), or that the phantom squirrel hasnt snuck in the bag and is scoffing everything !!!!!
Now every bag has a name..Fridgy stuff, freezery stuff, tinney stuff, cuboardy stuff: woah betide TBG if when packing Fridgy stuff should end up in the cuboardy stuff bag..... No wonder he needs to sit down.dunno why she does that as she still unpacks everything and puts it all on the side before putting it away.and they think i'm barmy at times ?????
My food bowls are in the kitchen, they are kept high as I have a long neck and its easy to eat/drink when stuffs not on the floor ( ha ha ha makes me laugh, humans so gulible)
The best thing I love is taking stuff out of my food bowl and putting it on the floor to eat, it makes a mess, but not as much mess as when I decide I want to eat in the dining room and carry it through........................Or when i wipe my snout on the carpet.... tickles my nose