Rushki's

So he has decided to come home then..... so no big good bye, a cuddle for ole bum face and a pat on the head for me- hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, rather the wrong way round me thinks.
TBG has just been to Russia ( I would say wher- but i cant spell it ( its not like he's a spy or summat and I cant say- the lummox isnt that clever !! )
So anyhooo I was left at home with the mardy one and the smelly one- JOY.
Twiggs seems to think my name is.. Getoutofthe kitchen and forcrapssakegetoutbeforeispillsummatoneyouGETOUTOUTOUT..... not a very nice name..I was only seeing if the cheese fairy had left anything for me- its not my fault they have a long galley kitchen is it ????
She took me for walks ( joy I must remember to put her on my xmas list for that, especially a big thanks for the walk in the rain !!)
The smelly one ( was Emo, then emoooooo - emotional cow- then pinkmoo- for the pink hair) Now she has green hair- a bit like Grotbags, so I shall call her the Smelly one as she would seem to take more baths than me, but doesnt seem to use soap somehow... Anyway the smelly one has taken over the dining room which is my domain, she takes over my sofa ( yes the one I had for my birthday) then has the cheek to moan when I sit next to her and Blow Nellie kisses with my bottom :) and she gets really annoyed when I stick my snout in front ofher lap top screen to have a gander what her and her stinky mates are putting on twitter/facebook/bebooooo and stuff.... amazing when they see one another they grunt and dont really speak then rush home to " Chat" on line all night.. I really like butting the screen and leaving Nellie snot on it :)
So i was left with these two bundles of joy all week wondering where the heck TBG had got to.... then ah-ha I knew he was due back as Twiggs was no longer cooking cabbage and broccoli but a proper meal and actually doing house work and making The Smelly one clear her stuff up.
Later than said and one burnt dinner ( probably tasted better) later.. TBG is home- HURRRAAAH ! mad wags and face licks all round- i know not very dignified but hey I was over come in case he'd brought me some duty free Bonios or summat... No nothing !!! No even one of those cool Rushski hats with the furry ear flaps... as well at least he's brought him self home to rescue me from a life of boredom with the mardy ones.. i LOVE YOU TBG x x xx

Make My Own NellieCache

As you may have gathered..I am not really too keen on this Nelliecaching thinghy they have been up to- by all means those two fools can go out on their bikes ( that reminds me Twiggs needs a new wide load sticker for her arse- I pity the poor road user stuck behind that mountainous glob of lard she calls her bottom)..
They drag me out saying " Ooooh look shes all excited and barky and happy, Oh look she wants to come.. no its more the fact I am happy they are going out and will leave this 45 MPH couch potato at home to snooze..the only time I get excited is when I know they are going to the beer church and I can snaffle for porky puffs etc.
So I do the whole running off and hiding at my bed looking at the wall - i don't have peripheral vison so if i cant see them they don't exist.. ITS NOT A GAME !!!! It means I dont want to go out and traipse for hours playing neardy hide and seek with a clown that hasnt written the clues down correctly- thus meaning lots of hanging about and bum faces from Twiggs.....

I have thought how ever of sneaking out and making my own Nellie Cache which involves a trip to local joke shop to buy some fake doggy do-do...( or I could just leave one of my own ( Like TBG does to bake off and form a skin) then be gluing this to a top of a Tupperware container and burying the container with just the do-do sticking out amongst some leaves... Hmmmmmmmmmm i wonder if anyone would ever find it ????

GPS ( Greyhound Peeing System)- Nelliecaching

TBG has purchased a GPS as he has gotten into Geocaching- described as a Treasure hunt -looking for Tupperware using Million dollar equipment. We call it Nelliecaching as I always get dragged along * whoop-whoop* ( that was sarcasm- in case you missed that).

Who needs to pinpoint where you are when you have me ??????
Every time we go on a walk I always have at least a zillion wee-wee's along the way- so if we did get lost- I would know the way back using Greyhound Peeing System- simple really.
Anyway this involves TBG sitting for yonks on his lap top looking at Nelliecaching sites then transferring the details to his little black book.... then choosing where to go.
I am dragged along - yes dragged.. some of these places I am most certain he could use the car for..but Oh no Captain beefy legs has to walk everywhere.
Pinkmoo was given control of The GPS - meaning she got to hold my lead- as if TBG would give up his new toy !!!!!!!.
So anyway we walk walk walk walk- then yup walk some more looking at its toy until we sort of get to the right spot maybe ( well with in 200 meters !) then out comes the black book with the clues on , for example Behind a tree- DUH, we are in a freaking forest- this may take some time then !!!!!!) so on this instance in the rain we are hunting for the cache hidden behind a tree in a forest in the rain.. Twiggs & pinkmoo grow weary after unearthing several worms, dead badgers and sleeping tramps- Oh no Ole Bear Grylls is well into it all and keeps getting the book of clues out in case the clue has magically changed since last time twiggs had to drag it out of the knapsack - word of warning when on laptop looking it up please check to make sure you have written the clues down correctly or that the cache has been maintained and not in need of replacing etc..or the next nellie cache may be a 6foot 4 bald Brummie buried in the woods under a dead badger

Yup ...its Wales again

Yep... the house is in disarray...the camping gear is spread everywhere..... Twiggs is twitching like Billy-o at the mess, TBG is fretting about The Emo ( now to be called Pinkmoo as its dyed its hair bright pink- or so i am told- she still smells the same
* Ewwwwwww*)fretting about how much stuff Pinkmoo and Twiggs plan to take with them as the Damper van was sold last year........and will he get it all in the car ? He did suggest taking small amounts and washing as they went- I think the look Twiggs gave him soon put paid to that......
Quite sad aboutThe Damper van going as it means less floor space for me to loll on and I will have to sit next to stinky Pinkmoo on the journey ( the bonus being..she ALWAYS has food :)

I thought it impolite to ask as to where we were going- well its obvious really- bloomin Wales & not nice flat south Wales either..North Wales- land of the mountains...If I was meant to climb mountains I would be a billy-goat not a sleepy ole Greyhound..........

Journey there was O.K I had my holiday hat on- although really in hind sight it should have been a sou'wester and maybes an oilskin too or just a wetsuit- judging by previous years.
And I only broke wind once- not bad going for me.
They got the tent up in record time and twiggs only got the bum face on once- although these days its hard to tell whens shes not got it on ( well she is knocking on a bit). I claimed my room and my bed first which is only polite after all I am the youngest...... It did happen to be TBG and Twiggs room - hey I wasn't going in Pinkmoos room, give me some credit please.....
We had sunshine- I did consider ringing the Guinness book of records as we had been there over two hours and had NO rain... ....... We headed off to town- I didnt mind walking , its only two miles, its down hill and thats where the Ice cream man lives..nom nom nom... rains coats around their waists off we set with TBG wanting a pint and to try his GPS out.......

Cluck..cluck...

All good things come to those who wait.................

Tgb, Twiggs, Gimoo and I have all been on holiday to Wales in the trusty VW Damper Van...and indeed once again Wales was damp.. ( I very nearly had a nasty case of trench foot) Every year they go to the same place- dont get me wrong , i love holidays and I love Rhyns camp site ( well who wouldnt with it being a working SHEEP farm :)- but come on guys use a bit of imagination when it come to picking holidays.
Now I am not moaning because its Snowdonia and they make me walk every where, yes walk every where...for those of you who didnt understand that...I said WALK EVERY WHERE...Holiday...my soggy left foot..holidays are supposed to be relaxing and a time for snoozing etc...... Not with these dopes.....
The upside was being allowed to have an ice cream every day..oh yes and once again, no flake and no sauce..but hey-ho beggars cant be choosers ... and it was was funny to watch Gimoo's face when i was brought one and she wasnt... ( Hey im only 8- and the baby here, shes 15- she can buy her own, plus they love me more ,ok )

The sleeping arrangement were great Twiggs and TBG made a rather comfy mattress for me ( ok I lay on their legs and listened to them moan about it all the time )which was fab.....well it was fab until the tent gave into the rain..and we were nearly washed away...that must of been agony for Gimoo - water actually touching her skin.
So we had to go and buy a new tent...... hurrah..much bigger than the last one.
I sat in the damper van and watched them put up the new said tent in a pouring gale whilst Gimoo tried to hold on to the old tent..think if her feet were not so very huge and kept her grounded she would have been whisked off by a tenty type hot air balloon whent the gusts of wind came.. TBG and Twiggs laughed till twiggs nearly wet herself at Gimoos squeals coming from inside the ravanged tent.... I was sniggering like mutley in the safety of the van ......
Ellie Pup and The osbournes set up camp with us on day 4, which was great and Ellies dad took me to the sea side and I was allowed to run free on the beach...Hurrahhhhhhhh... ok so it was raining and windy and I didnt get A) A donkey ride or B) candy floss...but I did eye up some seaguls who flew off like big scardey cats the minute I was unleashed..that was lovelly.. I felt like Forest Gump running and running - well for about 5 minutes until I was pooped out.

They let me off for a run on the space in the camp site.
Gimoo, TBG and Twigs all possistioned themselves so they could catch me in case I decided to run away - ahem..run away ? me no think so, I have it made here, anyway off I went... I ran behind a tent mid circle, full on yomp- mouth wide open and |"bumped" into one of the campsite free range chickens who had escaped... " Opps ! " I rescued it from behind the tent where it could of hurt its self on the tent pegs..so I did the decent thing and as my mouth was open already I scooped it up and brought it out to safety.. and THEY SHOUTED AT ME !!!!!!!
Drop it Nellie..I thought Twiggs was going to pass out...
So I did and it ran away, so I picked it up again, this time you see worried about Gimoo squishing it with those giant feet of hers, and again they shouted at me.
TBG made me spit it out and dragged me off to the damper van, whilst Twiggs was examining the said chicken for bite marks ( as if....... )
They seem to have mistaken the chickens god almighty swalking .....It was really thanking me for saving from potential danger.... Honest

Birthday Queen

Whoop-whoop...it was my birthday..." Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to meeeeeeeeeeeee ....! " TBG and Twiggs had very kindly brought me variety of squeekedy-deekey toys which to kill...( may i add now for the record it is not at all funny to hide squeaky toys under my bed....so I jump out of my fur when diving into bed....ever !!!!! ).
The Abino Emo.....who is now a Ginger Emo..or Gimoo.... so many redheads mask the red in their hair..not this loon she is a proper carrot top by choice..even now weeks after the did that awful thing to herself I will find my self running into the room and stopping dead in my tracks thinking there is a stranger in the room and getting all unnecessary thinking I have a new victim to stroke and fawn over me....then I realise its her ---- only because its glued to its laptop while lounging on the sofa. ( Yes the sofa I am NOT allowed on ).
I do wonder if the Gimoo and I are related as we are both equally lazy, hungry and great at shedding hair everywhere.
Anyway Gimoo very kindly brought me some lovely pigs ears ( only because I suspect as she knew Twiggs would be greeting them later having been recycled into a big sloppy Nellie doodle :)

Well everyone went to work and I felt a wee bit sad as Twiggs Always books the day off for Gimoo's birthday...I was a little hurt as I know she loves me more than Ole Carroty top yet she'd gone to work and left me.

" Sigh "

When later in the day Twiggs and TBG came home with the bestest ever pressie ever for me...a sofa for the dining room .... no more hard floors for me.." Whoop-whoop"
Well I was just so happy I couldn't believe they had brought me such a great gift, even if Twiggs did cover it in more throws than they have in Habitat.
Its great I can spread out and see directly into the kitchen and being higher up I can see whats on the work surfaces. Lay there all comfy with my eyes boring into whoever is cooking in there ready to pounce should anything fall onto the floor.
I lie on my bed just waiting and watching and if anyone should sit on my sofa....then its fair game...I will run across the room and jump on them and demand a fuss..this is the price you pay for using MY sofa.
Twiggs says its not mine..and belongs to every one.....
i know though that its mine all mine all mine...... would have been a nice touch if they had gift wrapped it though.....

Stop Milking It

Twiggs had dissapeared for a few days...didnt know where she had gone ? All I knew was that suddenly TBG & The Albino Emo were suddendly eating much nicer food then dissapearing to " Visit ?" in the evenings....
Then Twiggs came home hurrah..turns out she had been held captive in this big building surrounded by a massive car park..I know this as I went in the VW Camper to pick her up when the realeased her...... well she still looked the same, a bit frailer and she sure smelt funny..but it was still Twiggs..
We got her hiome and I really dont know if they have been giving her injections of the Greyhound gene but boy oh boy she sure slept a lot, she slept more than me..which takes some beating !!!!
We had lots of cuddles on the sofa as thats all she did was lay on the sofa with a big blankie over her, which I managed to weedle my way under many times and have a hug and a much with the feeble one....
Talk about role reversal..Twiggs sat on her big fat bum all day while TBG hoovered ( well in a fashion) and cooked all the meals and picked up all the Nellie Doodles I left in the garden..he did the washing....The ironing..well that pile got so big I was a wee bit concerned that if it toppled over on me it would suffocate me .
Nanny Glen came to visit and did all the ironing..then the next lot TBG tried his best until Twiggs offered to pay The Albino Emo to do it all......that was fun to watch !!!!!!
Well 6 weeks on the novelty is wearing off as she is still at home interupting my sleep patterns, clattering about in the kitchen...to which of course I just have to go and investigate..just in case something should happen to fall into my food bowl....How is a hound supposed to sleep 24/7 with her making a noise ?????
And the worst of it is ...she keeps taking me out for walks..as walking is good for her they say.....yes for her maybe, not for me......
As much as I love her I do wish she would go back to work or go shopping or anything to leave me alone to sleep...........