Reverse Psychologythingamujig

I am a lot of things, which I will quite happily hold my paw up to

for example:

I am...............

1) Lazy

2) Always hungry

3) A cuddle monster

4) A hunter and killer of furry teddies ( especially those with annoying squeeky innards)

5) Deaf, well selective hearing anyway

6) A trip hazzard

7) Narcleptic

The list could go on and on, however there is one thing I am not and thats " STOOOOOOPID"

I fully understand the working of reverse psychology and I am more than aware when these folks in my house use it on me........

For example Twiggs is in the kitchen and contrary to what she says she is not chained to the sink, and she says " Nellie, get out the kitchen "

I know this means " Nellie stay in the kitchen and I will give you something yummy in a moment "

She says " Nellie get your nose off the oven door, you will burn your nose ! " I know this means,

" When you yelp in pain I will give you something yummy to take the hurty away "

She says " Nellie get out from under my feet or I will end up dropping this item I am holding on the floor"

I know she means " opps-a daisy...I seem to accidently on purpose dropped that, ah well Nellie you may as well have it now ! "

So you see when Twiggs says " ohforfourfootsnake get outta da kitchen you bloodydog !!! "

I know she really means , " Nellie you know how much I love you and dont mind tripping over you, you stay right there and something yummy will come your way !!!!!

See I'm not stupid after all.........